When it comes to matters of the heart, people often say that “opposites attract.” If this is indeed the case, it may also hold true that two individuals in a romantic relationship deal with money matters in very different ways.
The nature and magnitude of the differences may vary based upon each partner’s relationship with money as well as their respective value systems. While couples might believe they hold similar values around major issues such as lifestyle, religion, and raising kids, values around finances could hold surprises for both.
Financial stress is often singled out as main contributor to a break-up or divorce, surpassing other reasons such as cheating, and annoying habits. Security and stability in our household and relationship are what we all seek, and if our partner’s overall wellbeing is such an important factor, why do we often avoid discussing our finances?
Avoiding the money conversation
Money is a sensitive topic of conversation, which is often avoided. People frequently take their financial expectations for granted, and don’t always see the need to discuss their money matters as clashes in this area often lead to arguments and resentment.
Various other factors may also play a role: whether we view this person as our potential life partner; and whether they are mature enough to grasp the magnitude and importance of such discussions.
One of the partners must however be bold enough to take the lead when it comes to initiating the money conversation and agreeing on a financial management journey that both parties are comfortable with.
There are a number of questions you need to ask yourself before initiating this very important discussion with your partner:
Building a future together
Ask yourself: can you work with your partner to build a better future, one that is savings, investing and wealth creation-led, where financially prudent decisions will be made jointly?
This will enable you to build a financial legacy for yourselves and your family. I call this the #WealthLegacyProject. This all starts with planting small and manageable financial seeds, which need to be nurtured to avoid financial mistakes being deferred to the next generation.
This Valentine’s month might be the right time to raise this topic with your partner. The money conversation may test the resilience of your relationship, but as long as the result is a concrete plan on how to save to spend, save to invest, and create wealth together, you are on the right path.